Helping?

It's amazing the things that wake me up at 3a.m.  This morning I was jolted out of a sound sleep by wondering if I was really helping by helping.  I thought of how I try to make it all happen for my children. I have been known to move heaven & earth to see that they achieve their desires. But, if it requires ramming down a door that God might be trying to close, then am I truly helping?
We had so much trouble getting to closing on my daughter's house this summer. One obstacle after another crept up & I bravely slammed them aside. We got the house & then it burned..........The next house she is going for has gone without a hitch.  Every door has opened for this one. Hopefully the outcome will be much better.
I helped my son start a business. Every door had to be wedged & pried open.  It was such a challenge to get it going.  The business has been a huge drain, both financially & physically. It has put a huge strain on several family relationships.  My son desperately wishes they had never started the business & would love to sell it.   I wonder....
Yesterday yet another door slammed hard in the long, difficult process of helping another daughter & son sell/buy a house.  We have been battling since October in what should have been a very simple process. Tempers are flaring & Mom can't sleep.  Is it worth pursuing? Or is God trying in His protective way to close a door that I keep sticking my foot into?  Once again I wonder...